Undefined

Undefined

 

“You enjoyed that!”

    “So did you. Your presence was almost glowing when they pushed the green fluid into his arm.”

“I accepted what happened.”

     “That's a lie. Tell the truth. You enjoyed watching him die! Your thoughts were swirling with anticipation, about us, about our families, and it all centered on his death. You think we'll all be better for it.”

“Why won't we be better off? Tell me if you’re so smart. Suddenly you understand all of this, murder, revenge, judgment, and healing. You think …you understand, healing: no you don't! I only know what direction I'm being guided towards—it's not my choice, but I feel it—taking me to another place, and I'll go willingly.”

      “So you don't accept all of this, and now you want another path, away from me. Well I don't, I won't forgive predators, rapists, and murderers . I want to see them all on the table soaking up the green fluid!”

“We can't continue like this. Yes I felt something at that moment — it was a strange sense of joy— but it hasn’t changed anything, and neither will interfering.”

     “I can't forgive what they did.”

“Then you will remain the way you are now.”

    “How can you just let it go? I heard that gun fire- the one that killed you- I still feel that bullet, as if it hit me. I constantly see—my last moment of life— that flash at the barrel of the gun.”

“It's not about that anymore.”

   “What’s it about, then?”

 “It's about letting the living, make their own decisions, until their time has come. We can move on from this, this stasis, from ourselves.”

   “What about the ones who make a bad decision?”

“Like we did? There is nothing we can do about that. I'm going to see the kind man who gave us a ride. He's dying, and he’ll become an angel when he passes.”

   “So he’ll never be a wandering spirit like us.”

“That's correct. He's calling for me now.”

   “He’s calling for you … but not for me?”

 “You must come with me.”

   “No, I’m going to go see Mr. Fred Waters, who sits in his prison cell , pretending that all is forgiven.”

“You can’t do that. You must come with me”

    “I’m not taking any orders. Goodbye!”

***   

 I’ve lost it all, my life, my family, and my best friend. Lisa will become an Angel , I’m sure of that. All I want to do is make that man suffer—the pseudo accomplice —the true mastermind: Mr Fred Waters, the predator who knew he would rape and kill on that day, and how he would use those chains.

*** 

“Good evening Mr. Waters.”

     “Who are you? Get out of my cell. Guards! Someone is in my cell.”

“They can’t see or hear me Mr. Waters.”

     "Who are you?”

“You know who I am. I look the same, and my voice is the same as it was twenty-eight years ago. You remember me crying, pleading for my life, and begging you to ‘let us go’. I’ve been in your thoughts and nightmares for a long time. The last time you saw me, you ordered your nephew Allen to shoot me.”

     “You’re the one they found in the barrel.”

“Good, now we can talk. I’m not going to ask you, why.”

     “Then what are you here for … revenge?”

“I watched your nephew die. I enjoyed that moment. The changes in his respiration, taking in those last breathes of sterile air. The malfunctions with the equipment, letting him linger in that state of consciousness, watching him tremble, just before death.”

     “You’re here to kill me?”

“A lot of time went by. We, I mean me and the other girl—my friend—that you killed, forgot about you. But she has moved on to be with angels, and I’m here with you.”

     “Kill me or get out of my cell.”

“Nothing has changed you. Not time. Not reflection. You give orders. You bear your false witness to god every day, lying to him, telling him you didn't kill those girls.”

     “I didn't kill them. I only had sex.”

“Liar! You choked some with your bare hands …your callused hands that disgrace true, hard working men. Men who work each day, with their bare hardened skin: bare hands like my father used to work on cars. The hands he washed every day, trying to clean his hands, his heart, and his mind. Staring into that dirty sink, scrubbing, thinking, rinsing, hoping …to be free of my memories. He could never work hard enough to forget me, to just let me be the past. You left the scrapes of your calluses in his soul, it eventually killed him too.”

     “You ran away.”

“I did, but you took my life. You stole the lives of so many. The ones who were easy prey, like me, and the family members who died not knowing how to handle the grief.”

     “Get it over with, do what you came here for!”

“I’ve been thinking about that—what I came here for—and how I would do it: to become like you—and enjoy the satiable pleasure of taking another person’s life.  Perhaps I’ll use a guard, or maybe another inmate to help fulfill my desires.”

    “You’re still a whiney little coward, just like the day you died.”

“No, I’m different now, my presence glistens with thoughts of revenge. Look into your mirror you will see my whole life— the life you took away.”

    “I don’t take orders from a kid.”

“Stand up and face the mirror Mr.Waters!”

    “I see you, unchanged.”

“No, that’s another lie, you took everything from me. I grew up, got married, and had kids.”

    “Look for yourself, you were going to die anyway.”

“Your lies won’t save you.”

    “I’m forgiven and ready for Heaven,” Mr. Waters yelled, his words echoing through the walls of the prison.

“Heaven ?”